Maybe it was going  through all the old pictures that made me a little bitter, or maybe it was the four espressos,  but I was in a reflective regretful mood this morning. Then I caught myself. I’ve mentioned before my philosophy of life, if one can call it that, today I want to add to it a little.

Squandered time and opportunities, bad decisions and worst choices, generally behaving like a jackass. I have a ton of those at my back, and sometimes I catch myself playing shoulda-coulda-woulda. What I should have done, what I could have done, what I would have done.

It’s a trap.

It’s a waste of time.

It’s weakly self-indulgent.

It’s a fundamentally flawed exercise.

I’ve let these gremlins plague me for too long,  now I’m putting  them to bed once and for all, Texas style.

Nothing defines you as much as what you do today. Don’t let the fuckery of your past, become the fuckery of your present. Yes, that’s a technical philosophical term. Being unhappy about the past is completely useless, concern yourself with your life as it is now, as you want it to be tomorrow. Displeased with the current state of affairs? You want to change something in your life? Backward fantasizing won’t do it, but actually changing something in your life will. If you maintain the status quo, you will keep on getting exactly what you have been getting. That works for you? Fantastic. Otherwise you need to take action.

Shoulda, coulda, woulda no more. It’s go time.